Blog

Dear Parents,

I have read on many Facebook parenting groups about issues around bedtime and sleeping quality of babies and toddlers.  This prompted me an idea to write about getting a better sleep…

In my 1^st article about Children and sleep, I explain the importance of getting restful sleep as well as provided games to play prior to bedtime to relax and help towards the night.

Here I wish to concentrate on simple but important rules to follow no matter what age is your child, to allow getting a better sleep.

We all, adults, and children, work pretty much the same way…

• Good habits and consistency are key! You may consider yourself to be the “fun mom”, playing with them until late afternoon outside, or the “hard-working mom” coming home late and wanting to see them before they go to bed…it is still super important to allow them normal bedtime hour at a similar time daily. What is important for them should be our first priority!

• No screen time before bed- it awakes them!

Research found that blue light from a television screen, phone, or computer monitor can interfere with the production of the hormone melatonin. Watching TV, playing video games, or scrolling web pages on a phone or computer right before bed keep your child up an extra 30 to 60 minutes, according to a 2017 study.

• Make the time before bed as calm as possible! This is when reading a story is perfect (of course choose the story wisely!). I personally like to summarize the day in the evening with my 6 years old every night when he is in bed as well as praise him for what happened, how he behaved with a friend or how he helped at dinner time, and always kiss goodnight, showing lots of love, hugs, kisses and affection. In addition to this, I like to say 1 or 2 sentences about what is happening tomorrow so he has something interesting or exciting to wait for, and positive thoughts get into his mind.

• Accept some exceptions to the rules…Sometimes, we all have a hard time falling asleep or waking up from a nightmare so as long as this happens only once in a while, it is ok and allow it with lots of love and care!

• Avoid discussing anything that frustrated her during the day and always finish the dialog with praise, love and trust, positive ending is key. So if she wants to talk about something that happened with a friend and made her sad or rejected, discuss, listen mainly but always end this with a good closure (how well she handled it, how strong she is, how sensitive she is and where this will help her in life…)

• Keep the “stressful topics” or “frightening images” for daytime. Nothing like this before bed!

• Learn to let it go and do not fall asleep with her in her bed! Do not stay forever either there. It is crucial toddlers learn to go to bed alone and fall asleep alone. This is important not only for their sleep quality (since they will wake up during the night, as we adults do, and they will learn to fall asleep again by themselves) but also for your own healthy couple life or private life!

I found that sometimes, in parenting, we can choose an attitude today that makes us feel good right now but will have effect in the future and we sometimes refuse to see the long term. It is easier to deal with “now and here”! for example, falling asleep in his bed every night with him or having her fall asleep near me in my bed…

I am not talking about once in a while when your husband is away or you are on holiday, as this is “special time and IT IS FINE! I am talking about making this daily, as an habit.

Choose the right habits for long term and what will help him, not what makes you feel good today!