“The presence of a grandparent confirms that parents were, indeed, little once, too, and that people who are little can grow to be big, can become parents, and one day even have grandchildren of their own. So often we think of grandparents as belonging to the past; but in this important way, grandparents, for young children, belong to the future.” Fred Rogers
Today, and more than ever, I wish to share with you about the importance of grandparents in the life of our children, especially grandparents who can and like to play!
This will be a personal post, without any specific recommendations for products or games, but just a reflection and an important reminder for all of us, parents of today…
I have a wonderful 98 year old grandmother who I am very close to, and who I am so proud of!
As a child, we lived nearby, and I would go to her home for sleep overs. I would play cards for hours with both of my grandparents, mainly Rummy! I just loved it! Even now, playing Rummy reminds me of many great memories and precious moments together.
My grandma lives in Nice, France (where I was born). She lived through the Holocaust and I was the first grandchild she started to talk with about her past. I have continued to always study this part of history The next two generations after her have been so much influenced on what she went through during her teenage years during the war, that I learned her way of looking at life, always looking for a positive angle!
As a result of her experience of surviving the holocaust, she has always encouraged us, and still does, to enjoy life, to enjoy every moment, to play and be grateful of what we have.
It is rooted in my relationship with my grandmother, that I am a strong believer in supporting the grandparent / grandchild relationship– as well as the overall importance of grandparent influence.
We, the parents of today, are extremely busy, not only in our careers, but also in keeping the family together, house tidy, while maintaining our couple life. Given our increased access to parenting tips and articles, we share more and talk much more, aiming higher than past generations. We are more conscious of our parenting and more self-critical about it, feeling pressure to constantly improve our relationship with our children. The challenge becomes really being fully present in the moment, putting down our mobile phones, and really engaging with our children. We are all trying our best and it is a challenge to every parent.
Grandparents however, now have the time and the serenity to play, watch our children grow, learn about them. Some of them want to “fix” what they did not do as parents with us. Some just enjoy it so much and love to fill up their days with their grandchildren, either as they visit them, or through skype from far away.
I can see the relationships my 14 year old daughter has with my mother-in-law who lives in another country: open, safe and free.
I can be a great parent to her but will always wear my “parenting” cap, caring, worrying, teaching, preaching…as a mom, I have that role to maintain.
Grandparents can just enjoy the drive! No need to educate and this, in a sense, is such a freedom.
My grandma is always looking at me like I am the most extraordinary person ever, no matter what I say or what I do and she is so convinced that she can make me believe right then as we talk
this is a fabulous feeling I hope we all get from at least one person in this world.
We all need at least one person who always sees the good, and ONLY the good in us…
I believe in grandparents’ power to play with our kids the importance of grandparents in our lives!
Based on “Today Parenting Team”: What children can receive from healthy relationships with grandparents?
· Someone who offers unconditional love
· A mentor who can help with problems
· Companionship and someone to talk to
· Someone who will stand beside them
· A window into their parent’s childhood
· A sense of adventure
· Kindness, humor, and patience
· A zest for life
· Family traditions
· The ability to laugh at oneself
It’s important for parents and grandparents to agree on the role of the grandparents in their grandchildren’s lives. Some of the biggest conflicts between grandparents and their adult children are about the level of involvement.
Grandparents should try to remember that they are not the parents. The decisions are not theirs to make.
Parents should try to respect the fact that their parents did okay raising them. They should also try to realize that grandparents aren’t trying to take over, just to be involved.
Both grandparents and parents should try to remember that they are all part of a wonderful circle of life and are connected through children they all love dearly. It’s all about the love and grandparents offer that is in abundance.
…and for a personal end, here are some pictures of my grandma and me:
And here is a photo of 4 women generations😊
So make a room for your parents or parents in law in your life so your children enjoy them and feel them as both sides have a lot to gain…and when your children are happy, you are too… when your parents are full of love and get love, you are also happy!
Karen Klein
Yes, you are right, grandparents are of great importance in the lives of our children! The way they know how to love and pamper, they have no equal!!! 🙂
Yes, you are right, grandparents are of great importance in the lives of our children! In the way they know how to love and pamper, they have no equal!!! 🙂